I Want to Be “Too Loud”
Sometimes, I still face blatant racism.
A few months ago, a man physically pushed me and hurled verbal abuse.
In the past, I would’ve stayed silent, hoping to endure quietly and move on. But I’ve realized that silence only gives the experience more power over me. Fighting back has become my way of reclaiming control. It doesn’t erase the discomfort, but it loosens its grip on my thoughts. It helps me move on faster.
This incident reminded me of how deeply entrenched racism is. Not just in Germany, but everywhere. Back in my country, it manifests differently: more covert, embedded in social norms and quiet discrimination. Here, it’s often overt, aggressive, and sometimes violent. The forms vary, but the root is the same: hatred and ignorance targeting someone’s identity.
It’s exhausting to live in a world where someone’s humanity can be dismissed so easily. Encounters like that remind me just how pervasive these attitudes are. How thin the façade of civility can be. But acknowledging that reality isn’t enough. The ubiquity of racism can’t justify silence or inaction.
Standing up for myself didn’t just help me. It challenged the very system that enables such behavior. I refuse to let racists define who I am or dictate how I feel. Fighting back — whether by confronting someone, supporting others, or educating those around me — is how I resist the normalization of cruelty.
But I also admit: there is no single correct way to respond to racism.
Some fight loudly. Some choose silence. Some walk away. Some cry. Some organize. Some write. Some lean on their community. And all of it is valid. Everyone deserves to navigate these painful moments in whatever way brings them peace. My way isn’t the right way. It’s just my way. No one should be forced into resistance when they are simply trying to survive.
What weighs on me most is knowing how many others endure this daily, often without the ability or space to respond. Racism is more than isolated acts of hatred; it’s a systemic problem that demands collective reckoning. Whether it’s through calling out harm, showing solidarity, or fostering true understanding, we all have a role to play in dismantling it.
The man I met that day may never change, but that’s not the point. The fight isn’t about transforming every hateful individual. It’s about creating a world where their actions are no longer tolerated. A world where everyone’s dignity is protected and respected, no matter who they are or where they come from.
